AAP ka Tihar

‘What are you thinking about Mina?”  asked my husband,  seeing me lost in thought.

“I was thinking of getting back to playing tennis,” I replied.

“What ! At your age ?  You will break a leg!”

“That’s rubbish!” I retorted.  “ I am fit and raring to go.”

“Maybe”, but where will you find a private tennis court all for yourself ?” 

“That’s where Tihar comes in. I have it all planned out! Haven’t you heard of Tihar’s beautiful tennis courts where many a notable prisoner  has sported a  racquet?”

“Tihar Jail!”  exclaimed my husband. “But what’s the connection? Only inmates can use those courts.”

“Exactly,” I replied. “So here’s the plan. I will join the AAP Party, and get into Tihar.”

“That’s very ingenious, Mina. Yes, the ED seems to be on an arresting spree, and its ‘Pehle AAP’ as I see !  But prison rules are strict.  Will they allow you to take your tennis racquet?” 

“Why not?”  Arvind Kejriwal had special requests,   Though, of course, I am neither a diabetic, nor a head of state.

My husband persisted: “What about laundry? You are particular about choosing the best washing machines.”

I laughed aloud.  “You’ve got to be joking! Don’t you know that the Opposition is provided with the best washing machine ever…. Squeaky clean is the popular catch-phrase!”

“Oh, of course! I get it,” smiled my husband. “And you will come out snowy white, in your tennis outfits. Incidentally, while you are there, you can start an IPL – an Indian Prison League; and can have your cricket too.”

“Not a bad idea,” I replied. “I can raise that pitch too; and any arrested match-fixer can take guard.”

My husband cautioned me: “There’s a snag though. You may have to sing to the ED’s tune: ‘AAP’ jaisaa  koi meri zindagi main aaye…tho baat ban jaye.’ And, if you don’t answer, they will accuse you of  ‘not co-operating’, of being evasive like Kejriwal.”

“Oh come on! Kejriwal has every right to be ‘cagey’.”

Article 20(3) of the Indian Constitution, protects an accused against self-incrimination; provides thus:  “No person accused of any offence shall be compelled to be a witness against himself.” An accused therefore, has a fundamental right to ‘remain silent’.” 

“You will certainly raise the bar!” said my husband admiringly. “You being a lawyer, helps. So it’s all settled.  But you better hurry. AAP leaders seem to be getting out fast on bail.”

“Don’t worry Anand. I will have my fill of tennis, and only then move across courts to serve up a petition for quashing my arrest.”

“That’s brilliant Mina! But once back home, how will you continue to keep fit?”

“Easy. Tennis done, I can run. Eat wisely. Work on my ‘ED’.” 

“‘ED?” “Exercise and Diet. Plus, I will need a  new ‘WM’ to keep me motivated.” “A washing machine?”

As usual, I had the last word: “A ‘weighing machine’ !”