Office conversations veer towards work and other mundane things, for there’s hardly time and inclination to speak about anything else. Rarely does it involve discussions about sensitive topics like religion, politics or gender. Most of us grow up finding discussions on these as too sensitive because on rare occasions that it happens with people outside our close circle, it puts people on the guard, and at times, makes them aggressive as well.
This happens because they arise out of one’s beliefs and are hence deeply personal. Most of the time, people’s religious beliefs, even if it’s atheism or agnosticism, are those that they grow up in. The line between belief/faith and rationale is very thin and can be easily trespassed. People hold their religious and political affiliations sacrosanct. Any effort by an outsider, especially at the workplace, to the contrary may be deemed offensive or insensitive.
Even before politics, religion is a person’s core identity beyond the name and family. It is one's way of ‘belonging’, one's identity with a group holding similar beliefs. One is raised to believe in its dogmas which become a way of life. Politics, on the other hand, is an acquired leaning. These give them a sense of belonging and connectedness to a large group outside.
But politics can rival religion at times in terms of passion. Perfectly normal people turn aggressive when their religious or political beliefs are discussed or challenged. Anyone commenting on their belief is considered a challenge to which they have no response. Hence they cling to their beliefs and turn aggressive. Aggression can thus be best described as a defence mechanism.
Gender issues are far more sensitive to be discussed in the open, leave alone in the workplace. Although plenty of debate takes place about gender sensitivity, inclusivity, freeing gender choices from being perceived as taboo and accepting people for what they are rather than for their gender, there still is much work to be done. People have their own preferences for pronouns to be referred by. It has become commonplace to have some colleague who has a non-binary gender identity or changes his/her gender at some point in time. One must be willing to understand the personal battles they would have faced with the world before coming out or having a gender change, so there’s no point in adding to that. At the workplace, all of these issues become a hotbed of pressure.
Keeping the decorum
Unless it’s vital or specifically asked for by relevant authorities and purposes, one must refrain from expressing religious or political affiliations or views on gender. It might hurt others and work against you, especially at social gatherings which do not have them as part of the agenda.
At the workplace, right from the time of your job interview, keep a guarded stance because frankly, you’re there to work and deliver results. In a global context, people are uncomfortable dealing with someone who openly flaunts his religious or political affiliations or opinions on non-binary gender issues because they perceive it as passive-aggressive behaviour, challenging them and their beliefs somewhere.
The world is a better place, perhaps because of diversity, because it brings in inclusiveness and acceptance of others. Transgressing that sacred space of the other person creates a threat in the mind of the others and results in unwanted animosity.
The best thing, hence, is to keep whatever belief you have limited to yourself. Don’t comment, even if provoked, on other people’s religion, gender inclination or political beliefs. Don’t get agitated if someone comments on your own because that is what they want to happen, although unbeknownst to them.
Understand that each one has a right to hold whatever belief they want. Respecting their views and opinions is the best way to also be yourself in the same world that you cohabit with them. The more we accept differences, the stronger we will be as mankind. When we know something can potentially damage our relationship or harm harmony at the workplace, why add fuel to fire?
The world over, it is becoming increasingly acceptable to practise religion or support political/gender ideologies at home and be thoroughly professional at the workplace and at social gatherings. When one works for inclusive domestic companies or multinationals and across geographies, the plurality of cultures is expected to be respected. Minding one's own business is the best way to maintain harmony.
(The author is a Belagavi-based counsellor)