Who would have thought that a jewellery advertisement featuring a baby shower would be called out for glorifying ‘love jihad’? The sight of a pregnant Hindu woman being pampered by her Muslim mother-in-law was enough to needle opponents of interfaith marriage. What began as outrage soon turned into a call to boycott the brand.
Going by their official statement, the company had not expected its new campaign to stir up a frenzy. Apparently, they wanted to celebrate the feeling of oneness, and inspire people to come together. However, they ended up taking down the advertisement when it got hostile reactions on social media.
The withdrawal offended another set of people who were initially applauding the company for promoting interfaith understanding. They were upset that the advertisement had been removed from the brand’s social media accounts, citing hurt sentiments and the safety of employees, partners and store staff. This gesture was interpreted as a defeat for secularism.
Beyond online shouting matches, there are people who approach this incident with restraint and nuance, refusing to join one or the other camp. Filmmaker Kabeer Khurana was raised by a Hindu father and a Muslim mother. He grew up in a home where people were free to pursue their own faith. He was startled by the backlash against the advertisement.
He says, “I thought it was beautiful and did not realise why people were raising objections. The Hindu majority in our country is being made to feel that they are persecuted. Their anger is turning into bigotry and Islamophobia.” Though he is not religious, he is respectful of people who are.
Adman and filmmaker Rafeeq Ellias feels that prejudice is not the monopoly of any one religion. Having married poet and art curator Bina Sarkar, he has a personal insight to offer. He says, “Interfaith marriage is a delicate issue because people of all communities consider women as property, in terms of an acquisition or a loss.”
According to him, a particular campaign might strike an emotional chord but is no indication of how progressive a company is, how they treat employees, or what their political leanings are. “The task of advertising is to grab attention. Advertisers are equally at home with sexism and secularism, as long as they can use it to sell their product,” he says.
Ellias was born in a Kutchi Muslim family and Sarkar in a Bengali Hindu family. Both are non-believers. For Sarkar, the religion one is born into is “a cosmic accident”. She is wary of ceremonies and rituals, especially if they are anchored in religious chauvinism. She calls herself a humanist and does not subscribe to any religious observances.
She says, “Rafeeq’s parents wanted us to do a nikah but he said ‘no’. My father took an instant liking to him. Initially, my mother was terrified as she was conditioned by Partition and its communal violence.” To avoid complications, they got married in Tokyo and lived there for five years. Both families became more accepting of the marriage when their son was born.
Journalist Mihir Srivastava, who co-authored the book Love Jihadis: An Open-minded Journey into the Heart of Western Uttar Pradesh (2020) with Raul Irani, believes that ‘love jihad’ is “a figment of someone’s sinister imagination.” To him, marriage is a meeting of hearts.
He says, “I am a proud Hindu. My faith is not diminished by the individual choices that people make for love. Let’s be clear. The company wants to sell jewellery to Hindus and Muslims. It does not make business sense to antagonise any community or the government.”
Unofficial copies of the advertisement continue to circulate on YouTube. Interfaith studies scholar Urmi Chanda says, “Several real-life interfaith couples have shared their own stories and wedding photographs on Facebook and Twitter to do what the advertisement intended. They succeeded in telling us that religion is no bar when love is real and that we can coexist in harmony.”
(Not Only But Also is a regular column with a fresh take on gender, sexuality, and more. The author is a Mumbai-based writer, educator, and researcher. He tweets @chintan_connect.)